January 14, 2003 :: 10:15 p.m.

People who say you can get in a mindset where you can resist pain are FULL OF SHIT.

Or at least they're not talking about this level of pain.

Difference tonight is that it came on while he was fully awake, so it's hard to judge how bad it is because he's in a different state of mind. To me it seemed about like a 6 or 7.

(Handwritten across the top of this page in the paper journal: fuckety fuck fuckety fuck fuckety fuck fuckety fuck fuckety fuck fuckety fuck fuckety fuck fuckety fuck...)

Also had one about 2:30 p.m. that lasted all evening until the next one came on.