Sleep, How Can It Be Wrong?
Tonight I decided I needed rest I had been nursing a headache (not a cluster) that I had awoke to the day before and decided that my wacky theories about sleep being a trigger for pain in my head MUST be false. (I go back and forth on thinking I am crazy about this point)
So I retired early, leaving my wife to deal with our extremely rambunctious 2 year old. (I had been dealing with him all day so I guess I shouldn't feel too guilty). I stayed in bed to see when I would crash, and for once I would be dressed for it and in the proper place for sleeping. At around 10pm I realized I was "sputtering" in and out of sleep like a short circuiting toy. I was jerking around and fighting it like I usually do (involuntary response akin to mild night terrors, possibly like the hypnic jerk (Myoclonic spasm?) movements infants make). Normally I try to occupy my mind during these periods because to be honest it is unpleasant and feels a bit like I imagine having a bad head injury would feel like. This is why I don't make it to bed so often and fall asleep wherever I happen to be when the "switch" finally gets thrown.
This is interesting...
"Myoclonic spasms and Epilepsy:
Spasms which are accompanied by a loss of consciousness indicate epilepsy, and should be explored further with an epilepsy clinic or specialist."
I am not implying that I think I have some form of epilepsy, just that there is clearly something weird going on in my noggin that no one has yet figured out fully. Topamax IS an anti seizure medication after all. But I digress...
The last time I saw the clock it was close to eleven and I finally passed out for good. At around 3:30am I came awake with a lot of pain. It was the same headache but it was intensified greatly and I could not sleep through it. I can no longer ignore it, I have to firmly assert that the longer I sleep, especially off schedule, (2-7am the more likely I an to get headaches of all varieties.
I hate these "other" headaches almost as much as clusters because they are annoying in a whole different way and require different tactics. Ignoring mild clusters is a skill I have mastered, it seems unfair to force me to learn a whole different method of pretending to be "normal" around other people.
Honestly I think I am failing and people are starting to tire of me.