November 10, 2005
Poor Doc is just completely exhausted. Last night I woke up at 2 and he wasn't in bed. I got up to go find him and he was still working on the computer. Then I woke up again at 5, and he wasn't in bed again. This time he was sacked out on the floor downstairs with the lights all on and an infomercial on the TV, loud. I made him get up and come to bed (he said "I can't... I can't... wait... OK, don't think about it, just do it. Don't think about it, just do it.")
I guess that the good news is, he hasn't had any awful ones in the past couple of days. I don't even know that he's had any nighttime visitors at all -- or at least that he's been able to wake up for. He's also letting/making me sleep through the night and not get up when he's up. I have such mixed feelings about that. On the one hand, I guess it's important that at least one of us get a good night's sleep so I can handle household business and keep us on track with our schedules and lives. On the other hand, I know that my presence while he's in pain is somewhat of a comfort, so I feel horribly guilty staying in bed while he's moaning in pain in the bathtub or downstairs.
His plan may not work, as demonstrated the other night -- was it Sunday? Monday? I can't remember now -- when I got up in the night when I heard the tub running, and he made me go back to bed. I laid awake for about 2 hours feeling guilty. :)